It took around 29 years for me to figure out that I was holding myself back. Practically three decades for me to discover that I wasn't yet chasing my biggest, most magical dream. I thought I was, and I'm sure at certain points I was on track, but for the majority of those years, I played small. Tiny. Miniscule.
Then something clicked (in the ways things click in one long string of realization after realization until one night you can't sleep because there is a resounding truth pounding in your head that you just can't deny), so I changed. I started going after what I wanted. I wrote a book. Serendipitous and surprising connections were made. Slowly but surely, the outside aligned with the inside. I wasn't waiting for my dreams to come true, I was actively participating in them coming true.
Do you know if you're holding back on a big, magical, wonderful, life-altering dream? Maybe you can answer that and know exactly what that dream is; or maybe you have no clue what lights up your passion and you're not sure why. Let me make this clear: Big and magical doesn't mean fame and fortune and prestige and being popular. Big and magical means being rooted in your authenticity, being connected to what makes you a remarkable human and using your talent in service of the world.
So why haven't you gone for it yet?
- You're chasing a lesser dream. You think you're going after what you want, but you're in a "shadow career" as Steven Pressfield calls it. You are in a job or position that is good enough, it uses your talents to some extent, you can't complain. If you are using any of those phrases to describe your so-called dream right now, you're not connected to it. Find something you connect with, and you have the start of your big dream.
- You think you need certainty. You know what you want, but you don't see how it will all turn out. Guess what? You'll never know. Certainty is not part of the dream pursuit. Have to is part of the dream pursuit. Have to regardless of the outcome = big and magical dreaming.
- You're telling yourself false stories. Any time you're telling yourself that you are not enough of this or that, you are lying. The worthwhile dreams will challenge you, yes. But they will capitalize on something intrinsic about you. When you lie to yourself by putting yourself down, you are extinguishing your essence. Don't you do that.
- You've been told you're being too ambitious. People are always going to think you're crazy. Decide now whether or not to believe them. Be thoughtful in your execution. Use logic. Also, use whimsy, passion and innovation.
- You don't know how to start. No one knows how to start. Get over it.
- You think you must "pay your dues" first. Another big obstacle I faced. I was constantly paying dues. To whom? I don't know. Which was the problem. There is no "them" out there. There is only what's in your mind. Here's a more powerful process to use: Instead of paying your dues, collect experiences, use them as a platform and take the leap yourself.
- You're waiting for the perfect moment. There is no such thing. You won't be nearly as ready, funded, educated or experienced as you could potentially be wayyyyyy down the line in the future. Waiting to live your life sucks the wind out of your mission. This is the perfect moment. Nownownow.
- You don't know what your dream should be. Maybe you don't know what you want to do. That doesn't mean you can't connect to what you believe in, what you value, what you know is true and good. Start with the things that light up your attention. All it takes is a small dose of intentional introspection to start a creative revolution.
If you haven't chased your big, magical dream yet, now is the time to figure it out. Remedy the ailment that holds you back. You have something more to give.
if you're looking for coach or creative mentor, I do both. Email me: firstname.lastname@example.org
If you want a workbook that you can use on your own time, I have one. Go here.